Well, I have kind of been all over the place tonight. For a while I was reading the Patrick Mathews’ book, “Never Say Goodbye”. Eventually it brought me to tears as I was reminded of how deeply I miss Laureen. I had to put the book down. And then I was going to try to write a blog entry. I’ve been a bit of a blank when it comes to writing for nearly a month now. Oh, I’ve written a few things here and there, but honestly, pretty dark and depressing stuff for the most part. I cry when I re-read it. Not exactly meant for public consumption I guess – more of a purging really.
So, while diddling around on my computer – oh, no, I know what triggered it. . . I was listening to Pandora and came across this song by Joe Livoti from a CD called “Ghost Memories” and it was actually the title of the CD that caught my attention because as I was putting down the Michaels’ book I was thinking “why doesn’t Laureen give me a sign that she is around me?” and then I see this CD title on Pandora, “Ghost Memories” and it caught my attention.
Anyhow. . . segue to me going to Amazon.com to look it up (and add it to my wish list) and one thing led to another – like Amazon recommending similar bands and one of the bands it mentioned was Blackmore’s Night. Now Ritchie Blackmore is one of my all-time favorite guitarists. After looking over the many CDs he has done with the Blackmore’s Night project, I selected one to purchase and then after hemming and hawing I decided to just download the MP3 instead (half the price of the CD) and so I am listening to it right now. Certainly not his “guitar-god” best, but interesting and what the hey. . . once upon a time I was into the whole Renaissance Fair thing so I can kind of dig it and some of his guitar work is still interesting. . .
However, halfway through listening to the CD (Shadow of the Moon), I had an urge to revisit a bygone era and so I went over to YouTube and found a few versions of my all-time Deep Purple favorite, Child In Time. I particularly love the original DP line-up that included Ian Gillan and Jon Lord of course!
The immersion in music for the past hour and a half did help to calm me down a bit so now I am more mellow and have returned to the Shadow of the Moon CD and am listening to it even as I write. One of the interesting things I did find on YouTube tonight was a 13 minute interview with Ritchie Blackmore. He’s a kind of interesting guy. I can’t say I know much about his past, other than his music. Guess he isn’t exactly the warm fuzzy type. His opening comment was something to the effect of being obsessed with death. Eh… it happens to all of us – no escape. Ha – and now I can be cavalier about death where only a few hours earlier I was weeping over it.
I do find, for myself, that music is a balm. I can lose myself in it. The rhythms and patterns and tones. It sinks in deep. Not everyone relates to music. I don’t know why – maybe it’s a soul thing. That was something that Patrick Mathews (he’s a medium in the same vein as John Edwards and James Van Praag) was talking about in his book – that whatever passions you have/had in life, they go with you to the Other Side and remain a part of your life over there too so that it is almost something that is a part of your soul / spirit.
Well, off to bed. Hope to maybe go off for a morning meditation tomorrow so I better get a little shut-eye now.